Michael Battalio


Thursday, January 01, 2009

The Seventh Annual Christmas Mass e-mail

For those of you that somehow didn't get this (I had a lot of e-mails bounce back this year; update your facebook e-mail address, people.), here is the Seventh Annual Christmas Mass e-mail.

Greetings and salutations,
Welcome those old and new to the Seventh Annual Christmas Mass e-mail.
I've been sick the last several days, so this will be short-only a thought or two. Firstly, let's do some math. As I get older and sort of wiser, I have noticed one thing in particular, that time goes faster and faster the older I get. The average life span of an American male is about 70. I'm 23 so 47 years left. Forty-seven times 365 is 17,155 days, times 24 is 411,720 hours, times 60 is 24,703, 200 minutes. I could go on, but 24 million is a lot, or is it? I'm already a third of the way done with my life on average. What have I done or accomplished? Quite a bit I hope, but there is always more I can do. Here is my first thought: don't give in to boredom and laziness. Use the time wisely. I can't say how many times I've gone through a day where I could have done a lot, but I never actually got anything accomplished. What a waste of time and space. There is always something to do. Learn a new hobby, make a new friend, read a good book. Not all of us can win the Nobel Prize or become president, but we can all use our time wisely. And that means savoring every fleeting moment.
Secondly, I don't know about the rest of you, but I see the light at the end of the tunnel that is school. That light happens to be the freight train of real life though. I've done and am currently doing a good job of putting it off, but I know the real world is coming eventually. To those less successful than me in avoiding the real world, good luck; I will be joining you at some point, maybe. A lot of you are getting jobs, going to grad school, and even starting families. (Congratulations to everyone that is getting married.) May you find contentment, personal accomplishment, and a bit of joy.
And that's all I've got this year. Enjoy the season, appreciate the little things, and take the time to give yourself some credit for making it as far as you have. Let me know how you're doing; it's half the reason I send this every year.

And the required bad joke...
During a visit to the mental asylum, a visitor asked the Director how do you determine whether or not a patient should be institutionalized.
"Well," said the Director, "we fill up a bathtub, then we offer a teaspoon, a teacup, and a bucket to the patient and ask him or her to empty the bathtub."
"Oh, I understand," said the visitor, "A normal person would use the bucket because it's bigger than the spoon or the teacup."
"No," said the Director, "A normal person would pull the plug. Do you want a bed near the window?"

Merry Christmas,
Battalio

1 comment:

Andy Lindeman said...

My family was a fan of the joke. I'll reply when I get back to the States :)

 
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